My sanctuary, my safe haven

Moving from a place you have gotten used to since birth to a place which is wholly stranger to your eyes is such an appalling experience. I remember my first few months of struggling and adjusting myself just to fit in to this so-called highly urbanized metro. My life way back in the province was really far different from where I am now. I’ve been working in Makati for over five years but back then, I actually had my second thought of moving and accepting the job due to my would-be environment. I had the apprehensions that a certified “probinsyana” would absolutely have to dare extend an extra mile just to adopt the city-life.

Finding where to dwell was the first I considered. Though, I do have relatives where I can stay to, I opted to find a different abode. Yeap, they’re my kin but I don’t want to squeeze in myself and be an added burden, este, responsibilities since most of them have already children to look after to. I did find one (boarding house with two rooms) and compromised to pay the bigger share just to convince my eldest sister moved with me, since she works nearby my working place. I need someone trustworthy to ask and get an outright answer of the things that might draw my concern while living my life here, and that’s my ate (thou most of the times we argue over small things because she’s is so clever, peace sis! J) Sad to say after a year, she had to go back to the province because her company has to close and that ended me to be finally on my own. I even cried the first night I went home and saw her room empty. But what I can I do? She needs to leave and I need to get on with my life without her.
It made me realize that living all by myself will give me more time to assess myself, bring out the best in me, decide on my own, live my purpose without turning back, walk head up and face the challenges of life.

And during my downfall moment, the four corners of my room became my place of safety to release the pain of being single-handedly; my own sanctuary who have witnessed my everyday battle of missing my family while fiddling with my new milieu; the haven wherein I can totally take off my different masks and be of myself for real. Thanks Roomy (my room). You’ve seen the tears I cried, the number of times I smiled and how I’ve grown a lot here. You are my sole eyewitness up to this moment.

Seeing myself now after five years (that’s also an additional five years to my age, whew! I don’t wanna to get old yet, really.), I can say that I was able to surpass and agree with the flow of life here.

Sayonara for now

I’m counting my days being with ANNA – my best bud-slash-touristguide in Makati.

I’ve been here for over five years now due to work commitment but never get certain of the place up to now. Yay! – must be the reason for always asking her help to track the place. Good thing she’s there (my one click away GPS); blocking even her busiest day available for me; my shield against stressful day; making me feel like I really belong here to stay. I love her for that - not to mention how generous she really is. She never fails to share even the tiniest blessings she received. Hardly would I find a friend who is such a bighearted like her.

I know heading my days in Makati will be different now that she (Anna) will be leaving anytime soon. Yokohama,Japan– her would-be new home for one year. I feel grateful knowing that she was chosen to represent the City Government of Makati as secondmen staff for the CITYNET (Ugh!, I did ask ANNA about it, but I can’t still remember its full name - must be sign of aging..lol ) event. I got so excited of the news when I first heard it, really. But after contemplating that there would be no more ANNA next month, I suddenly asked myself “Am I ready for this?”.

Days without her, will definitely uneasy to bear at first. There are so many things with her that I have gotten used to do: texting her during wee hours that I need someone to be with (expect the following day that her things are all packed ready for overnight stay at my place), barhops-slash-bandchasing, fun carnivals, tiangge-shopping galore, quiapo-baclaran tour (she toured me here just to see for myself that these two places are not situated in one place - which my belief at first, hahaha..i was supah “probinsyana” back then), our so called school days (casino days), attending rotaract activities, visiting my old folks while checking out restos that offers wide range of exotic foods, and of course spending Sunday in her place and have the taste of her dad’s very own sinigang na hipon.

For obvious reasons, we are more than sisters. We're like Spongebob and Patrick. She may be out of my picture sooner, but who cares? It’s just one year of being apart, anyway,right? Sigh. I’m actually trying not to be sad about it; to accept the grim reality that I have to go on with my life being left here and to settle for who’s around. This is how it’s always gonna be for one year.
But looking on the other side of the coin, I want to look at ANA’s departure as her way to explore more of herself in foreign land, to find what’s in store there for her and for me also to find my way to get through here or abroad perhaps.

I’d like to think that finding ourselves in different paths is meeting each other at the end of the road. So no SAYONARA (goodbye) for us but IRASSHAIMASE (welcome) to the opportunities that life has to offer.

Way for us to go my friend!, thou I am going to miss you dearly..